Passion

A lot of time has been spent in my head lately to determine what I'm passionate about. It's been hard to determine ever since a pretty bad start to a new year. Ever since I was young, I've been focused completely on music. I've thirsted and strove towards becoming a professional musician. Hours of training and dedication led me to some pretty awesome experiences in my life. I've literally played music since I was 5 or 6. I started out with the Piano lessons that a lot of kids go through and ended up adopting the clarinet and eventually dropping everything for the guitar. Then I started to sing and that is where my passion really found it's depth in my life.

Being able to sing and play the guitar was not something that came to me overnight. It took a lot of getting comfortable with my instrument before I was able to meld them together. Ever since that I've been in a ton of different music groups (bands) and that is where I've always found myself the happiest. I can truly say that my favorite parts in life are back in the days of playing with my brother and Tanner in our band The 9th Hour. We played at the Big Fish Pub, The Clubhouse and Nita's Hideaway to name a few. The best part was that we got to play what we wrote and didn't have to conform to anything that someone else said we had to play. It was amazing.

Through those opportunities I have had the chance to meet some amazing musicians and people and learn from them. I have also had the amazing opportunity of leading worship at a ton of different events and churches. It's a great feeling when you get called by a worship pastor at an awesome church and asked if you would come lead for a Sunday. It's also a great feeling to have my friends tell me that I'm good at what I do and ask me to play for them.

So what am I most passionate about at the moment?

The opportunity to be the worship leader for Stir at Chandler Christian Church.
For the third year in a row I get the wonderful chance at leading worship for UCYC this summer.
God has given me talents and I get to use them for His glory on this temporary and troubled Earth.
Writing music.
Growing with the amazing friends that I have surrounding me.
Furthering my understanding of spreading Christ's love that knows no bounds.

I will leave you with these lyrics that absolutely blow me away. They are by John Mark McMillan.
The song is called Skeleton Bones.

Peel back our ribs again
and stand inside of our chest.
We just wanna love you
We just wanna love you

Peel back the veil of time
And let us see You with our naked eyes
We just wanna love you
We just wanna love you

We want your blood to flow inside our body
We want your wind inside our lungs
We just wanna love you
We just wanna love you

Skeleton bones stand at the sound of eternity
On the lips of the found
And gravestones roll
To the rhythm of the sound of you
Skeleton bones stand at the sound of eternity
On the lips of the found
So separate those doors
And let the son of resurrection in.

Oh let us adore the
Son of Glory dressed in love
Open up your gates before him
Crown Him, stand Him up

Identity Crisis

No one can say they know their own identity.
They could have some aspects of it solidified, but who is to say that those may change over time? I have been trying to define myself as of late and all I come up with are questions. These questions are not easy to ask and they usually do not have a one word answer. Talking to good friends such as Kaitlin Smith and Elizabeth Hardin, I have come to find out that there are a few awesome people in the world that think like me. Since defining myself is such an impossible task, I will state some things that I stand for right now.

As of recent, I have come to the conclusion that the entire idea of politics is a joke. I find it appalling that there are 'Christian' politicians. That is like saying there is such thing as 'Christian' music. There can be people that use their faith to influence how they vote or how they write music, but I just don't believe that either of those things exist. That being said, as a Christian, are we not called to be a part of the Kingdom of Christ first? If so, then why do so many people worry about what is going on in the White House or what Republican had sex with which Democrat's niece? It is ridiculous to me to get so riled up about something that is so fleeting. It's as if they think that when they get to heaven God will ask them, 'Who did you vote for?' or 'Did you make sure to not let homosexuals get married?' NONE OF THESE THINGS MATTER!!! What does matter is that we are kind to people. We need to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, comfort those that are suffering and love those that are full of hate.
I'm going to say something that will offend a lot of people but at this point I just don't care.

GOD LOVES HOMOSEXUALS.

This has been something that is burning through my conscience recently more than anything. We live in a country that is founded upon the ideals of freedom, yet we try to restrict certain freedoms because they may offend someone. Do you think that the apostle Paul didn't witness gay couples in Rome? Do you think that Jesus didn't? If you do, you are gravely mistaken. The point is that I have no problem with a man marrying another man and vice versa. If they are in love, then who are we as citizens of a free nation to stop it?

Since we are, however, citizens of Christ's eternal kingdom, then why care what our screwed up, twisted, dirty nation does? The world is always going to have problems and always be on the verge of self destruction. Does a Christian standing up protesting homosexuality really help bring others to Christ in the end? No. Does screaming about how awesome America is really help the starving AIDS orphans in Africa? No.

I propose this.
Let's focus our minds and energy away from the he says she says garbage that is politics and focus on showing Christ's grace and love to the world. We can't do that by sitting in our living rooms listening to the constant gossip that CNN, FOX etc... puts out daily. All that will do is distract us from our true purpose on this planet.

So I said I can't define my identity but I can give a few descriptions of myself:

I am not permanent, meaning I will die someday.
Because I know this, I know the world is exactly the same way.
I try to meet people where they are without judging.
I try to love everyone. Even the crazy drunk people that want to fight me at my job.
I have red hair and I'm a ginger. haha
I know that there is a great message to be shared with those that are suffering.
Because I know this, I strive to make a difference in everyone's life that I come across.
I am only human, therefore I am sinful.
I am saved by a grace that I could never explain.

I kind of wanted to write I AM LEGEND, but I didn't

Love,
Nick Alvers

Growing Up

First year of Senior in college down. Only 23 credits to go!

I'm overwhelmed with the fact that I will be done with school in a year. It makes me really happy to realize that I get to go out and prove myself in the real world instead of resuscitating things I have been spoon fed here at OCC. I'm very thankful for all of the Biblical background studies I have taken part of and I wouldn't give those experiences back for anything. The only thing that I would have done differently you might ask? Probably not moved so far away from my family to an area of the U.S. that frustrates me and stresses me out beyond belief. I love the diversity of cultures and people in Az and we don't have it here at all in the midwest. I miss home more and more now that I'm done with this semester and I can't wait to work at UCYC for the summer! I get to lead worship for kids and help them enter into the presence of God! It is amazing!

My teacher told me today that once you reach 25 it's all downhill. I have been reflecting on that all day and have come to the conclusion that I will not let my life ever go downhill. I want to keep up with culture and the times and not be separate from the people I am called to be around and to love. I think that this year will mark a definitive change in my life and what I put importance on. I want to make sure that my main focus in life is loving people whomever they may be and whatever they may do. I am scared to be the middle aged guy that just sits at home and goes to church on Sunday. I want to experience God's creation and the amazing culture that surrounds me! I'm so excited for what lays ahead. I'll be back at OCC for 1 more semester and then I'm going home to finish up online and move on with life.

Thank you if you have read this far as this post is a bunch of ramblings.

Please check out www.soundcloud.com/nick-alvers if you haven't already.

I will be posting new music and projects on there regularly because that is my drive in life right now.

Favorite lyrics right now,

"Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars?

I could really use a wish right now."

Airplanes by B.O.B. Featuring Hayley Williams and Eminem.

Such a good song.

I am in love with music.

Relationships?

It seems at least here at Ozark, that so many people put emphasis on finding a girl/guy before they leave the school. I, however, am not one of those people anymore. Ever since I moved out of the dorms and the constant hypocrisy of it all I have begun a journey to better understand why this is such an important thing to so many people. I think that insecurity plays a huge role in all of this garbage thinking. Students need to be focusing on things that are important for them to focus on: Graduation! It is so disheartening and frustrating to hear time and time again, 'I'm not gonna find anyone' or 'Man I really wish that he/she were into me!.' The fact of the matter is that people are built to make choices and we can't force anything that isn't there. I'm not trying to 'bash' those that are happily married and are leading wonderful lives together. I'm just trying to say that getting married early is not an option for everyone.

I was totally hell bound on trying to find a wife at Ozark that I wouldn't even talk to a girl if I didn't feel attraction towards her. That is ludicrous when I go back and think about it! As guys/girls we need to realize that we are, in the words of Lil' Wayne, 'The sh*t because I was leaving skid marks on everywhere I sit. I am it.'

Confidence is a huge part of what girls look for in a guy. They don't want some whiny, Halo playing looser to come up and talk to them about how depressed they are. God wants us to realize how important we are first, then He wants us to prove it to people. If someone doesn't like you who cares? Honestly though, you are young, you are awesome and you don't need to worry so much! I'm not trying to sound arrogant, this is just what I have come to realize over this last semester. Stop trying to change who you are and start trying to prove to the world that you are awesome! Then girls/guys will get to notice you!

In the end we are Jesus' bride and we are going to join Him in a relationship that far exceeds anything we could imagine.

It is a slap in God's face when we look down on who we are and become depressed.

So rise up! Be who you are! And above, all things represent!

I love you! You are awesome!
God thinks so and that is all that matters in the end right?! RIGHT! Boo-Yah!!!

Pro Choice?

This is something I have been struggling with recently. I can't really decide where I stand on the matter. On one hand, I think that people being able to choose how they run their life is a great thing and totally what our country stands for. On the other I don't necessarily agree with abortion. I think that it is important for people to ask the hard questions that come when trying to absolutely choose a side. The question I am always pulled back to is, 'If a 13 year old girl is raped, and becomes pregnant from it, should she have the choice to abort the fetus?' I think that the emotional toll rape would take on someone is worse than anything I have ever had to wrap my mind around. On top of that is the baby going to remind her of that terrible occurrence and make her think suicidal thoughts. I just don't know because I've never been in that situation. The thing I always like to keep in mind is the fact that it is not an issue of salvation. Anyone can enter into God's grace in the end. I do believe, however, that the way some churches handle this situation is terrible. I have seen the 'Christians' out on the road spewing hatred towards anyone that would even consider the thought of abortion. Pro Life is ultimately where I lean because I don't want anyone to die. I just can't totally commit to it because of the fact that I think there are exceptions to the rules.

In the end will any of our petty bickerings over meaningless problems really matter?

The answer is that we are called, as Christians, to show God's grace and love to everyone. Whether it is going on a mission trip, helping an old lady across the street or just spending time with a friend that is hurting. Jesus Christ would have spent time with those that are struggling the most in life whether they were Christians or not. It is our job to project the image of Christ upon the world and screaming hate at people doesn't work. It never has.

On a lighter note,
Lady Gaga's performance on the Grammys was excellent. Especially when she brought out Sir Elton John for my favorite song of hers, 'speechless'.

Thoughts on L.O.V.E.

In the infamous words of Haddaway, "What is love? Baby don't hurt me. Don't hurt me no more."

Love is something that has popped into my head on numerous occasions recently. I can safely say I have never actually felt real love for someone outside of my family. This is something I would someday want to feel. There are a few things that come to mind when I think of what love is and what it even means. Love is when a parent decides to punish a child for doing something wrong so that it will save them pain later in life. Love is jumping in front of a bullet for someone. Love is dropping everything you are doing at the moment to be with someone.

Paul says this about love in 1 Corinthians 13, "If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

Paul is an amazingly passionate man especially when it comes to love for other people.

Another thought about love popped into my head this afternoon. The thought that love is rest. Think about all the things that we as humans pursue. We want money so we can kick back and do nothing but have fun. We want fame or glory so we can live the life of luxury without a care in the world. Both of these things are the human pursuit of rest. We will never find pure perfect rest until we are one with our creator, but He did leave us traces of it here on Earth. The most prominent one of them is definitely the emotion of love. In movies we see love portrayed as many things, but the most captivating one is definitely when two people are just happy to be with each other doing nothing at all. They don't have to share words. They don't have to go to work. They just are able to rest with each other for a moment suspended in time. That is a beautiful thought. That is what I want to pursue above anything else in this lifetime. I want to work towards my ultimate rest with a creator.

I'll leave this long post off with a thought and then song lyrics.

The thought of pursuing rest is a great one, however, it seems that some of us are more worried about cursing others that we lose sight of loving them. I really wish we didn't use our words and our thoughts to hate people.

Here are some lyrics from The Avett Brothers.
The song is called 'I and Love and You.'

When at first I learned to speak
I used all my words to fight
With him and her and you and me
Oh its just a waste of time
Its such a waste of time

Three words that became hard to say
I and love and you

I'm gonna give this a try

I don't really know what exactly I will blog about. More than likely, it will just be related to life as I live it which is exciting at the moment. I'm almost done with college and I think I'm gonna move to LA or NYC when I'm finished to pursue a career in music.

I spoke about that with my grandmother yesterday and she seemed fairly excited for me. That is a lot to say for her because of the fact that she really wants me to be a music pastor at a church which I just don't feel called to do at the moment.

Shawty's like a melody in my head....