Growing Up

First year of Senior in college down. Only 23 credits to go!

I'm overwhelmed with the fact that I will be done with school in a year. It makes me really happy to realize that I get to go out and prove myself in the real world instead of resuscitating things I have been spoon fed here at OCC. I'm very thankful for all of the Biblical background studies I have taken part of and I wouldn't give those experiences back for anything. The only thing that I would have done differently you might ask? Probably not moved so far away from my family to an area of the U.S. that frustrates me and stresses me out beyond belief. I love the diversity of cultures and people in Az and we don't have it here at all in the midwest. I miss home more and more now that I'm done with this semester and I can't wait to work at UCYC for the summer! I get to lead worship for kids and help them enter into the presence of God! It is amazing!

My teacher told me today that once you reach 25 it's all downhill. I have been reflecting on that all day and have come to the conclusion that I will not let my life ever go downhill. I want to keep up with culture and the times and not be separate from the people I am called to be around and to love. I think that this year will mark a definitive change in my life and what I put importance on. I want to make sure that my main focus in life is loving people whomever they may be and whatever they may do. I am scared to be the middle aged guy that just sits at home and goes to church on Sunday. I want to experience God's creation and the amazing culture that surrounds me! I'm so excited for what lays ahead. I'll be back at OCC for 1 more semester and then I'm going home to finish up online and move on with life.

Thank you if you have read this far as this post is a bunch of ramblings.

Please check out www.soundcloud.com/nick-alvers if you haven't already.

I will be posting new music and projects on there regularly because that is my drive in life right now.

Favorite lyrics right now,

"Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars?

I could really use a wish right now."

Airplanes by B.O.B. Featuring Hayley Williams and Eminem.

Such a good song.

I am in love with music.

Relationships?

It seems at least here at Ozark, that so many people put emphasis on finding a girl/guy before they leave the school. I, however, am not one of those people anymore. Ever since I moved out of the dorms and the constant hypocrisy of it all I have begun a journey to better understand why this is such an important thing to so many people. I think that insecurity plays a huge role in all of this garbage thinking. Students need to be focusing on things that are important for them to focus on: Graduation! It is so disheartening and frustrating to hear time and time again, 'I'm not gonna find anyone' or 'Man I really wish that he/she were into me!.' The fact of the matter is that people are built to make choices and we can't force anything that isn't there. I'm not trying to 'bash' those that are happily married and are leading wonderful lives together. I'm just trying to say that getting married early is not an option for everyone.

I was totally hell bound on trying to find a wife at Ozark that I wouldn't even talk to a girl if I didn't feel attraction towards her. That is ludicrous when I go back and think about it! As guys/girls we need to realize that we are, in the words of Lil' Wayne, 'The sh*t because I was leaving skid marks on everywhere I sit. I am it.'

Confidence is a huge part of what girls look for in a guy. They don't want some whiny, Halo playing looser to come up and talk to them about how depressed they are. God wants us to realize how important we are first, then He wants us to prove it to people. If someone doesn't like you who cares? Honestly though, you are young, you are awesome and you don't need to worry so much! I'm not trying to sound arrogant, this is just what I have come to realize over this last semester. Stop trying to change who you are and start trying to prove to the world that you are awesome! Then girls/guys will get to notice you!

In the end we are Jesus' bride and we are going to join Him in a relationship that far exceeds anything we could imagine.

It is a slap in God's face when we look down on who we are and become depressed.

So rise up! Be who you are! And above, all things represent!

I love you! You are awesome!
God thinks so and that is all that matters in the end right?! RIGHT! Boo-Yah!!!

Pro Choice?

This is something I have been struggling with recently. I can't really decide where I stand on the matter. On one hand, I think that people being able to choose how they run their life is a great thing and totally what our country stands for. On the other I don't necessarily agree with abortion. I think that it is important for people to ask the hard questions that come when trying to absolutely choose a side. The question I am always pulled back to is, 'If a 13 year old girl is raped, and becomes pregnant from it, should she have the choice to abort the fetus?' I think that the emotional toll rape would take on someone is worse than anything I have ever had to wrap my mind around. On top of that is the baby going to remind her of that terrible occurrence and make her think suicidal thoughts. I just don't know because I've never been in that situation. The thing I always like to keep in mind is the fact that it is not an issue of salvation. Anyone can enter into God's grace in the end. I do believe, however, that the way some churches handle this situation is terrible. I have seen the 'Christians' out on the road spewing hatred towards anyone that would even consider the thought of abortion. Pro Life is ultimately where I lean because I don't want anyone to die. I just can't totally commit to it because of the fact that I think there are exceptions to the rules.

In the end will any of our petty bickerings over meaningless problems really matter?

The answer is that we are called, as Christians, to show God's grace and love to everyone. Whether it is going on a mission trip, helping an old lady across the street or just spending time with a friend that is hurting. Jesus Christ would have spent time with those that are struggling the most in life whether they were Christians or not. It is our job to project the image of Christ upon the world and screaming hate at people doesn't work. It never has.

On a lighter note,
Lady Gaga's performance on the Grammys was excellent. Especially when she brought out Sir Elton John for my favorite song of hers, 'speechless'.

Thoughts on L.O.V.E.

In the infamous words of Haddaway, "What is love? Baby don't hurt me. Don't hurt me no more."

Love is something that has popped into my head on numerous occasions recently. I can safely say I have never actually felt real love for someone outside of my family. This is something I would someday want to feel. There are a few things that come to mind when I think of what love is and what it even means. Love is when a parent decides to punish a child for doing something wrong so that it will save them pain later in life. Love is jumping in front of a bullet for someone. Love is dropping everything you are doing at the moment to be with someone.

Paul says this about love in 1 Corinthians 13, "If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

Paul is an amazingly passionate man especially when it comes to love for other people.

Another thought about love popped into my head this afternoon. The thought that love is rest. Think about all the things that we as humans pursue. We want money so we can kick back and do nothing but have fun. We want fame or glory so we can live the life of luxury without a care in the world. Both of these things are the human pursuit of rest. We will never find pure perfect rest until we are one with our creator, but He did leave us traces of it here on Earth. The most prominent one of them is definitely the emotion of love. In movies we see love portrayed as many things, but the most captivating one is definitely when two people are just happy to be with each other doing nothing at all. They don't have to share words. They don't have to go to work. They just are able to rest with each other for a moment suspended in time. That is a beautiful thought. That is what I want to pursue above anything else in this lifetime. I want to work towards my ultimate rest with a creator.

I'll leave this long post off with a thought and then song lyrics.

The thought of pursuing rest is a great one, however, it seems that some of us are more worried about cursing others that we lose sight of loving them. I really wish we didn't use our words and our thoughts to hate people.

Here are some lyrics from The Avett Brothers.
The song is called 'I and Love and You.'

When at first I learned to speak
I used all my words to fight
With him and her and you and me
Oh its just a waste of time
Its such a waste of time

Three words that became hard to say
I and love and you

I'm gonna give this a try

I don't really know what exactly I will blog about. More than likely, it will just be related to life as I live it which is exciting at the moment. I'm almost done with college and I think I'm gonna move to LA or NYC when I'm finished to pursue a career in music.

I spoke about that with my grandmother yesterday and she seemed fairly excited for me. That is a lot to say for her because of the fact that she really wants me to be a music pastor at a church which I just don't feel called to do at the moment.

Shawty's like a melody in my head....